By an eerie green storm lantern
Three ghouls were playing whist
By an eerie green storm lantern
In the swirling mist
By an eerie green storm lantern
How could I resist?
By an eerie green storm lantern
That's the night we kissed

How you gonna get right down that spiral staircase
How you gonna get right down them spiraling stairs

Down below the cobbles shine
It's a sixty-foot drop from yours to mine
Better make it sixty-nine

All your mistakes come and jabber round your bedside
They brush your sleeves with loathsome tentacles
They even try to kiss you but...
Like rotting nurses
Curses, curses

"I'll tuck you in, sweetie!"
Says your biggest mistake
And after your mistakes, in come your failures
As only failures can...
They look at you reproachfully like a face in a frying pan
They sit there so dejected
'Til their heads fall in their laps
Then they bubble feebly at the lips
And their bones protrude
Right through their hips

[Hearing the ghouls sing]
By an eerie green storm lantern
Three ghouls are playing whist
By an eerie green storm lantern
In the swirling mist
By an eerie green storm lantern
How could I resist?
By an eerie green storm lantern
That's the night we kissed

Not a good night to be a red tomato
On a long green stalk
Not a good night to be a red tomato
Let's sit down and talk
Pull up a chair won't you?
We could send out for some straw if you'd be more comfortable
Maybe we could rustle up a beanbag
Now then, Mr. Gerrold
Take off your glasses
Take off your shoes
Why don't you, uh, loosen your skirt a little, Mr. Gerrold?
You're among friends here
Ain't that so...
We're gonna get really close
Ever been close?
Not a good night to be a red tomato
Oh! - are these your pips?

By an eerie green storm lantern
Three ghouls are playing whist
By an eerie green storm lantern
In the swirling mist
By an eerie green storm lantern
How could I resist?
By an eerie green storm lantern
That's the night we kissed